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Plans for [me]

God has plans for me.  I try to remember that every day.  More than that, I try to open myself up to that every day.

Because His plans are way better than mine : )

So today was one of those days; you know, it wasn't so great.  Wondering what I was supposed to be doing with my not-liking-my-empty-nester-life; my so-called career; my calling.  What is my calling anyway?  Am I questioning that?  Or did I ever really know?  What is my purpose?

You know?

So I search here and I search there and I search myself. And I end up here. Again.

----> Jeremiah 29:11               
  

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD,
"plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Hmmmmm.  As I read the words, I try not to let them seem too familiar.  I hate to admit it, but in the mood I'm in, they seem almost meaningless to me :(

I look at the words again, one at a time and try to apply them to me, personally.  That's better.  But nothing new, I mean, I've done that before.  Okay, look again.

LORD, what do you want me to see here?  Fine.  I'll just do what comes naturally .. I'll google it!  As I mention in 25 Random Things About Me ... I google everything.  As I start learning more about one of my favorite verses, I am fascinated and Jeremiah 29:11 begins to mean even more to me than ever before.  I begin by looking at Jeremiah 29:11 in many translations at Bible Gateway.

New International Version: For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

New American Standard Bible: For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.

The Message: I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.

Amplified Bible: For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome.

New Living Translation: For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

King James Version: For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.

English Standard Version: For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Contemporary English Version: I will bless you with a future filled with hope--a future of success, not of suffering. 

New King James Version: For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.

New Century Version: I say this because I know what I am planning for you," says the Lord. "I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future.

21st Century King James Version: For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end.

American Standard Version: For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith Jehovah, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope in your latter end.

Young's Literal Translation: For I have known the thoughts that I am thinking towards you -- an affirmation of Jehovah; thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give to you posterity and hope.

Do you notice something?  Only one of the translations, the NIV, uses the word prosper.  The most common word used is peace or welfare.  That's because the original word in Hebrew is Shalom, a word we are already familiar with.  I learned from the very enlightening site Does God Plan For You to Prosper? that shalom is normally translated “peace”, but it has a much wider range of meanings than our word “peace”. The Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament uses these words to describe it: “Completeness, wholeness, harmony, fulfillment. . . . Unimpaired relationships with others and with God.”

Prosper?  That seems so unimportant in the big picture compared to being complete and whole and in an unimpaired relationship with God, don't you think?

Hmmm.  Still feeling confused and praying for some mental clarity.  But thankful for this ray of light today : )

The [KCC] Office

My church did [yet another] cool video to show at service.  This one was a take-off of the TV show The Office.

The series the last several weeks has been about how to share your faith; watch Simon (played by my co-worker Mike Nelson) in this video to learn what not to do at the office!

P.S.  I make an appearance as an 'extra' at the Office Christmas Party along with my friends Robin and Alex : )  I had so much fun doing this!  Believe it or not, we were at work/church from about 6pm until midnight filming this 4-minute clip!

Also, this was filmed where I actually work at Kensington up in the administrative offices on the third floor.  In fact the cubicle where Chelsea was sitting was my cubicle up until about a month ago when we did some reorganizing!

God Can I Ask You a Question?

             

                -------->  Why?

I have this feeling of coming full circle.  Deja vu, if you will.  On February 23, 2007, I made the above post on Danae's website.  It was the one-month anniversary of her death, and I was thinking about the weekend after she died.  Our pastors at Kensington had been preparing for a message that weekend in the series they were doing, "God Can I Ask You a Question".  That message was called, "Why?"

-------------------------------------> Fast forward to this week.  My sister-in-law,  Danae's mom, was killed two weeks ago. We're in a different series now at Kensington:  My Faves.  Repeats of some of Kensington's best services.

        This weekend's message:  Why?



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And although I still don't know why this is happening. not understanding how Danae's sister and two brothers can possibly deal with losing their sister and their mom so close together ... I have to say this:  I can see God's hand in this.  There is a reason why, and although I don't understand it all, I can see God touching people through these deaths.

Consider these stats:  As of this date, my website about Danae (Things About Danae) has been viewed 3919 times, including 352 times since Beth died  My Celebration of Life video to Danae on YouTube has been viewd 2243 times. It amazes me that Danae's story and her testimony is being told to all these people. 

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I got this email yesterday from a 13-year-old girl, the same age as Danae:

"I was watching your dedication video fro your niece danae.

and i was just bored so i look at all of the things that my youth group puts up that is really inspiring, and then i was just looking up my name to see what came up and my name is danae also and i watched the video and read the link that you had for your dedication.

and i am a christian and i know everyone at my youth group, each week we have anywhere around 200-300 teenagers and newcomers to god, i lead a friend of mine to christ before and even recieved what my calling is from god.

i have realized christ in me and others have realized christ in me also but watching and reading about your niece has really shown me how much more room i have to grow and how much more dedicated to god i can be.

so i want to thank you for putting up this video and the link cause she wanted to change lives and she has definately changed mine forever more.

when ever someone calls me or says my name (danae) i will constantly be reminded about how she changes lives for god and how much she will be remembered and i just wish that when the lord takes me to be with him that i can meet her in person and that i will be loved and missed and remebered as much as you love and miss and remember her.

i will always be the best that i can be because of your niece danae. i am proud to have that name.   danae j."

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Thank you danae j.  And thank you to everyone who has told me or emailed me to tell me how Danae's story has touched them.  It's helping me understand "why?" ... just a little.

Cindi Marie [believes in HOPE]

My niece Cindi turned 18 in June. At the time of her birthday, her 13-year-old sister had been dead five months, killed in an awful car accident. What she didn’t know then, was that three months later, her mom would die in a freakish accident.

At the so-young age of 18, Cindi has endured tragedy that most people don’t experience in a lifetime. But Cindi has HOPE. Here’s what she posted on her MySpace the day after her mom died:

 

 

Cindi, you are amazing. Your strength, your courage and your faith is an inspiration to me and to many others. I am so proud of you Cindi. And I know your mom and sister are too.

 

                            I love you. Aunt Pam.

 

    Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans12:12

Acts 2:38

Change your life.  Turn to God and be baptized each of you in the name of Jesus Christ so your sins are forgiven.  Receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.  Acts 2:38 (The Message)

.[ Sara was baptized today ]

-------- > She had been baptized as an infant.  But she's been through so many changes this past year.  In particular, these past six months.  When my niece Danae died, our entire family was devastated including, of course, Sara.  But she put her faith in God like never before and as a result, her life has been changed.  Today was her public proclamation of that change.

The summer baptism at Kensington is done at Stoney Creek Metropark's Baypoint Beach.  Families and friends picnicked and enjoyed fellowship as our band played.  Craig Mayes did the message and walked through the crowd of almost several thousand just as Jesus did 2000 years ago ... and then ... 368 believers were baptized in the lake.

As usual, God's timing is perfect.  Danae's brother Marco (on his last day in Michigan before heading back to Texas) was able to be at Sara's baptism!

................................................................................................................................................

 

Sara,

May you experience the comfort of the Father's love, the friendship of His Son, and the wisdom of His spirit. May your walk with God guide, protect and uplift you always.  Congratulations!

I love you,

Mom

 

Leaving A Legacy

Tomorrow is Mother's Day.  And I've been thinking about legacies.  A few weeks ago at church, that's what they talked about.  And it made me think ... how do I want to be remembered, especially by my kids?  It reminded me of one of the Stephen Covey habits "Begin with the End in Mind".  Maybe if I think about how I want to be remembered, it will give me some focus, some direction in what I need to be doing now to get there. 

So here are some things that have always been important to me as a mom ... things that I hope I've clearly done in the past, that I hope I am still doing now and will continue to do, things that I hope my kids will remember when they think about me:

• I loved God and had the strongest faith in Him
• I laughed about things, including myself
• It was easy for me to say "I'm sorry" if I was wrong
• I was a safe place for them
• They could tell me anything
• I told them I loved them all the time
• Even when I messed up, I kept trying to get it right
• When I told them something, they knew they could believe me

I love this part of the video they showed at church when Callie was talking about leaving a legacy.  It reminds me of something I would do :)

Wednesday[s]

One of the things I have to do on Wednesdays at work is get things ready downstairs for New Community that night.  I love walking into this hallway.  It's dark and quiet and cool, not buzzing with noise and activity like during a service.  The presence of God is so heavy I can feel it weighing on me.  I always stop and take a deep breath.

Before I go back upstairs to my office, I look into the auditorium .. knowing that in just a few hours, it too will be full and loud and alive.  I love that.  But I love this too.  Quiet and still.  God is here.  I love taking just a minute to be still with Him.

Be still and know that I am God.  Psalm 46:10

Good Friday

This was my first Good Friday working at Kensington.  Denny and I attended the regular auditorium service at noon, then Sara met us at 1:30 for the walk-through "Experience: Journey to the Cross".  It was awesome ... a very tactile and interactive experience for all five senses.

We spent the rest of the day volunteering: Ushering, greeting, serving communion, working the information center, running errands.  I really enjoyed serving God this way today.

,

Who believes what we've heard and seen?

Who would have thought God's saving power would look like this?

.

.

.

The servant grew up before God—a scrawny seedling,
   a scrubby plant in a parched field.
There was nothing attractive about him,
   nothing to cause us to take a second look.
He was looked down on and passed over,
   a man who suffered, who knew pain firsthand.
One look at him and people turned away.
   We looked down on him, thought he was scum.
But the fact is, it was our pains he carried—
   our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us.
We thought he brought it on himself,
   that God was punishing him for his own failures.
But it was our sins that did that to him,
   that ripped and tore and crushed him—our sins!
He took the punishment, and that made us whole.
   Through his bruises we get healed.
We're all like sheep who've wandered off and gotten lost.
   We've all done our own thing, gone our own way.
And God has piled all our sins, everything we've done wrong,
   on Him, on Him.

Isaiah 53:1-3

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Who would have thought God's saving power would look like this?

                                                                               [thank you]

Picturing Heaven

I've been thinking a lot about Heaven lately.  It started with my niece's death in January.  I knew she was in Heaven, but I started wondering, what exactly did that mean?  On February 7, this was my entry on her website: 

Imagination

.[i-maj-uh-ney-shuhn]  –noun   

1.	the faculty of imagining, or of forming mental images or concepts of what is not actually present to the senses.

.

 

Let your mind wander for a moment.  Look at this picture and listen to the words of his song.  Imagine.  Meeting Jesus.

                                        And seeing Danae.  Once again.

    "I can only imagine what it will be like, when I walk by Your side...
        I can only imagine, what my eyes will see, when Your Face is before me!"
.

...no more hunger, no more thirst, no more scorching heat. The Lamb on the Throne will shepherd them, will lead them to spring waters of Life. And God will wipe every last tear from their eyes. Rev. 7:17

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Song by MercyMe "I Can Only Imagine"

             .................................... Yes, I was thinking a lot about Heaven.

I started my usual research process like I always do when I 'm curious about something, and found this incredible book Heaven by Randy Alcorn.

Picturing Heaven

By the time you finish reading this book, you will have a biblical basis for envisioning the eternal Heaven.  You will understand that in order to get a picture of Heaven, which will one day be centered on the New Earth, you don't need to look up at the clouds; you simply need to look around you and imagine what all this would be like without sin and death and suffering and corruption.

When I anticipate my first glimpse of Heaven, I remember the first time I went snorkeling.  I saw countless fish of every shape, size and color.  And just when I though I'd seen the most beautiful fish, along came another even more striking.  Etched in my memory is a certain sound - the sound of a gasp going through my rubber snorkel as my eyes were opened to that breaktaking underwater world.

I imagine our first glimpse of Heaven will cause us to similarly gasp in amazement and delight.  That first gasp will likely be followed by many more as we continually encounter new sights in that endlessly wonderful place.  And that will just be the beginning, because we will not see our real eternal home, the New Earth, until after the resurrection of the dead.  And it will be better than anything we've seen.

So look out a window.  Take a walk.  Talk with your friend.  Use your God-given skills to paint or draw or build a shed or write a book.  But imagine it, all of it, in its original condition.  The happy dog with the wagging tail, not the snarling beast, beaten and starved.  The flowers unwilted, the grass undying, the blue sky without pollution.  People smiling and joyful, not angry, depressed, and empty.

Think of friends and family members who loved Jesus and are with Him now.  Picture them with you, walking together in this place.  You reach up to a tree to pick an apple or orange.  You take a bite.  It's so sweet it's startling.  You've never tasted anything so good.  Now you see someone coming toward  you.  It's Jesus with a big smile on His face ...
                                                                               Heaven (pages 17-18)

By no coincidence, the subject of Kensington's New Community message last night was "What Will Heaven Be Like?"  I found out Craig Mayes was reading Heaven in preparation for that message ...

 
                                    ------> What Will Heaven Be Like? (50 min) Craig Mayes

So .. my curiousity is somewhat quenched ... at least as much as it can be for now :)

No eye has seen, no ear has heard and no mind has imagined
       what God has prepared for those who love him.  1 Corinthians 2:9

                                                              Read more excerpts from Heaven on Randy Alcorn's website. 

God of Wonders

I can't get my mind around this.